How misaligned roles quietly create tension and what to do about it
In family businesses, leadership roles are rarely designed from scratch.
They evolve.
They get inherited, reshaped, passed down, split in two, or quietly held onto—long after they stop making sense.
Sometimes that works.
Often, it doesn’t.
And when it doesn’t, you can feel it in the air. Tension creeps in.
Conversations become guarded. People avoid topics that used to be open.
Not because of bad intentions—but because something about the roles just doesn’t fit anymore.
No one wants to name it
We worked with a business where the founder had become “Chairman”—but in name only. He was still in the weeds, still signing off everything, still second-guessing the MD (his son). But no one had said it out loud.
The board was frustrated.
The MD was cautious.
The team didn’t know who was really in charge.
It wasn’t about capability.
It was about role clarity—and the emotional complexity of changing it.
When roles don’t fit, here’s what tends to happen:
- People start working around each other rather than with each other
- Decision-making slows down—or speeds up in the wrong places
- Tensions simmer because no one wants to seem ungrateful, overreaching, or disrespectful
- Talent gets blocked—especially when rising-generation leaders feel stuck behind undefined authority
And all of this happens quietly.
There’s rarely a row. Just a sense that things aren’t working properly anymore.
What helps
We’ve found that fixing the structure alone doesn’t work.
You have to understand the people first—what they want, what they fear, what they’re willing to let go of, and what they’re stepping into.
A few things that make a difference:
- Start with a blank sheet. Forget titles for a moment. What does the business actually need? Then map the people to that—not the other way round.
- Separate role from identity. Often, someone’s attachment to a title is less about power and more about purpose. Help them see their value in a different way.
- Bring it into the open. A simple conversation—handled well—can lift months (or years) of tension. It takes planning, but it’s worth it.
Final thought
Most families don’t set out to create misaligned leadership roles.
They just evolve that way—through loyalty, habit, and trying to keep everyone happy.
But over time, those roles start to carry weight.
And if no one’s quite sure what they’re responsible for—or where the boundaries are—things begin to slow, relationships strain, and progress stalls.
The good news? This is fixable.
And when it is fixed, the relief is often immediate.
Because in family businesses, clarity around people and leadership isn’t just helpful.
It’s freeing.
About the Author
Oliver Denton works alongside David Twiddle at TWYD & Co, helping families get clear on the people and leadership questions that aren’t always easy to name. His background spans academic research, communications, and advisory work, and he brings a sharp eye and calm perspective to situations where something doesn’t feel quite right, but no one’s sure why. This is the first in a series of pieces from Oliver, offering a slightly different take on the patterns we see in family enterprise.